Honesty: It works, honestly.
Honesty is a brackish tack to swallow. Love is patient. Truth is not kind. Truth doesn’t care who’s right. Love and truth aren’t always in agreement. Love is a farce without honesty. How honest can you be without becoming brutal? Is it possible to poetry-speak something to death?
But seriously, this is how I think love works:
- Be Open: Don’t keep secrets. Do not compartmentalize. Personal space is essential, but a mental and emotional closeness/honesty keeps communication easier. The things you feel like can’t be discussed, need to be discussed. Be open to your partner and yourself.
- Keep Friendships Clean: We all know what talk is appropriate for “friends,” and talk for those “more than friends.” Men and women can be friends with zero fuss. A goal of all involved is to keep boundaries strong.
- Leave Fantasy to Itself: Reality is not a burden. At least, it shouldn’t be. It is a fist-fight often lost, sure. Throwing caution to the wind for a fantastic world where all troubles are immediately eased by one person – that’s a dumpster fire waiting to happen. Never put your faith in a human being. Never go to war with a noun.
- Learn What Makes Them Laugh: Laughter is medicine. In the pursuit of love, missteps are inevitable. An appropriate salve is equal parts humility and humor. Good time or bad, their laugh is music. Make it play often.
- Bring Up Issues Immediately: Do not bring issues up immediately hot. First evaluate why this event or individual hits a nerve. It’s a bad idea to let it linger. Once you understand yourself, be honest and lay it out for your partner.
These are a few ideas gleaned from the last year of my life. I am vocal about who I cherish, but private in our affairs. Too much on social media leaves too little for those in love. The backbone of love is balance, and balance is not a word often found on my lips.
God keeps all in perspective. Fallible creatures will fail. Putting anyone on a pedestal is an injustice to all-involved. I thank heaven every day for the understanding and calm I experience. A wonderful person to share it with is a tremendous blessing.